(My dress is from IvyCityCo.)
I haven’t posted on this blog in SO long, but I wanted a place to share my notes and feelings from the Oprah 2020 Vision Tour because it was SO good! I grew up on Oprah, first hearing it in the background while my mom folded laundry or worked around the house, then as a teenager when I would come home from school and watch the recorded episodes on my mom’s bed. I always looked forward to her famous “Favorite Things” episodes and it was on one of these episodes that I discovered Sprinkles Cupcakes. I also learned that you can get addicted to plastic surgery, I was introduced to Bethany Hamilton (one of the most inspiring female surfers and athletes ever), and I first heard about this strange thing called “Skype” and was blown away that you could have a face to face conversation online!
Oprah’s 2020 Vision: Your Life in Focus Tour was an all day event that featured music, movement led by dancer Julianne Hough, and of course lots of great talks with Oprah and her best friend Gale. Todd and my mom surprised me with tickets to the show in Colorado, the last stop on her tour. I attended the event with my mom and it was so special and a major bucket list moment for us both. We had dreamed of attending The Oprah Show in Chicago, but the show ended before we got the chance. We got to live out one of our dreams by being in the same room as her (even if that room was filled with 15,000 other people!). I literally cried when she walked on stage and throughout the day. I laughed hard with my mom and felt so filled and inspired that I didn’t want it to end!
Here are some of my notes and thoughts from the tour that I frantically wrote down in my workbook that Oprah supplied along with a swag bag of fun goodies (direct quotes/thoughts from Oprah in bold):
Stress is you want the moment to be different than something that it is. Accept the moment for what it is. – I need to let go of the things that I can’t control, one of the hardest things for my type-A, anxious personality to do. I want to control everything and I am learning that with children and life, I control nothing.
Everybody wants to be heard. Find out the reason why they are speaking. – Listen to what people have to say. This creates deeper connection.
NO is a complete sentence. – I have gotten a lot better over the past year at saying “no” but I still feel the need to give a valid reason. Oprah explained that you don’t owe someone an explanation, you can just say “no”. Committing to and doing things you don’t want to do will bring resentment.
Live out the highest, truest expression of yourself. Work to get clarity on what that looks like. Live in the rhythm of your own life.
“Feast on your life.” (Derek Walcott)
Mindfulness: Present in the moment. Stay in alignment with yourself.
God can dream a bigger dream for you. – Sometimes I wrestle with balancing my own goals and motherhood. I love being a mom and have chosen to be a stay at home mom while also pursuing work from home. But there are so many things that I still want to do and I sometimes feel limited in my stage of life and circumstances. To me, this line was a reminder that there is so much more that I get to do now and that I am capable of doing so much more in the future. For now, I have to keep working hard at the things I am passionate about so that one day I can achieve some of those goals.
You don’t need to make yourself small for the benefit of other people. – In short, cut out the toxic people in your life. Don’t feel like you have to be less than who you are because other people feel they are in your shadow. Be YOU and the people that matter most will stay close.
In your 20’s- You are not supposed to know everything even though you think you do. You work your butt off in your 20’s so you can figure out what you are passionate about. Do what you have to do so you can then do what you want to do later. I had so many different jobs in my 20’s, some really terrible ones and some pretty good ones. None would I describe as my “dream job.” I honestly don’t know where I will be professionally in 10 years, maybe working full time or maybe not at all. But I do know that I can look back and say that I worked my butt off in my job, training for races, making babies, working at my marriage, balancing life as a working mom, my spirituality, and serving in various roles with my church. I feel good about where I am at now compared to where I started when I turned 20.
In your 30’s- Connect to yourself – I am definitely going to work on connecting with myself more in my 30’s!
In your 40’s- Life is GOOD! Oprah loved her 40’s and talked about how this is “when life gets good!” Meaning that you work hard in your 20’s and 30’s to have more time to do what you love.
In your 50’s- Do everything that you’ve been meaning to do.
“No life without a spiritual life.”- Oprah is deeply religious and spiritual. Whether your spirituality is religious or not, it’s an essential part of life.
“Fill yourself up- get still.” – We had a quiet meditation where all 15,000 people in the room went silent for a whole minute. Up until last year when I started yoga, I had never meditated before. I love to stop and listen to my breath now and it definitely helps me to refocus or calm down when I am anxious.
“Parents you are the manager of your children’s lives, then you become a consultant.” – An important note for me to log away for when my boys grow up. There will come a time when I am no longer the manager, just a consultant and there to offer my advice when asked.
“You are exactly where you are supposed to be. Knowing why you’re on this path creates intention which gives you the motivation to take the next right step. When the intention is clear, there is no betting against you. Set your intentions by asking yourself what you want and why.”
“God gave me the mother I needed to be who I am.” – Oprah shared this quote when talking about her strained relationship with her deceased mother. It broke my heart to hear her talk about it, especially sitting next to my own mother. I would not be who I am without my mom, and this day was so special because I got to share it with her.
I walked away feeling filled and resolved to be more intentional with my life and more forgiving of myself. I spend a lot of time dwelling on my faults and weaknesses as a mother that I don’t give myself enough credit for the things that I do well. I am trying so hard to balance so many things, and that is OKAY. I am working hard in my 20’s and will continue to do so in my 30’s so that someday I can pursue more of the goals that I have temporarily set aside while I raise my small babies.
I am blessed to be living such a full life and I look forward to the next decade of “connecting with myself.”
Good luck to everyone out there who has to survive another week of quarantine. Don’t forget to nourish yourself and make time for YOU. We can hard things!
-Makenzie